Three clumsy and stupid weirdos are drafted into the military when they are needed to take on a top secret mission. The first war hero, Sir Diggy Diggy Dogg III½, is a secret service agent at the White House. The second, Tecumseh Rafiki, is a movie star who takes his military position very seriously in order to prepare for his upcoming role in Saving Private Ryan Again. The third, Haywood Jublome, is a flamboyant gigolo. Once taken to a remote army base, the three men are given their mission by their new boss, Lieutenant Tito Captain. The assignment is to stop Osama bin Ladens granddaughter, Lucretia, from taking over the Orange Pudding Factory, as orange pudding is the food that is fed to all the American soldiers at war. Now on the case, Diggy, Tecumseh, and Haywood set out on their epic journey, only to realize that being in the military is not easy, and being a war hero takes a great amount of dignity and perseverance.